Identity

Identity is at the root of everything we are. It is also incredibly mysterious. We can say identity is a combination of the things we associate with. We can say identity is how we desire others to perceive us. We can say that identity is the culmination of self-talk and our cognitive process and thus our behavior. Or we can say identity is something so much deeper than we could clearly define.

However we understand it, identity is a culmination of a rooted system that provide life and purpose. Some of these connections help us to change into what we are becoming. While others are systems that served past purposes that we return to in order to grasp for clarity of our identity.

We may identify with aspects about ourselves more than others, and then we use these aspects to answer the question of our core identity whether they are in fact our identity.

In this process, there are times we can see what we are to become and other times our identity gets clouded in a mix of emotion, experience, and self-talk.

One of the major drives of life is becoming the person you were meant to be. We long to answer the question, “Who am I?”  We are in constant search for identity and purpose.  This is because it is either unclear, or we feel the missing element of identity that allows us to see the purpose of the rooted system of our lives.

Identity connects everything and will drive us to seek things aligned with our understood identity. Identity shapes how we spend our time, who we associate with, and the decisions we make.

Alright, probably enough meta. So what do I mean?

Until recently in history, not only was the search for identity not as prevalent, but even the use of the word “identity” was dramatically lesser.  The farmer didn’t think about who they were to become or what they were to do in life…they just farmed.

In the increasing freedom in the choices of life, we have opportunity to associate both with people, organizations, and vocation more freely than ever before. This leads us to ask the question, “Is this really who I am?”

This question is not bad. In fact, this question will lead to some very important self-discovery. The issue is that the answer is not always that clear. This leads us on the perpetual search for the key that will align and give purpose to the rooted mess that is “me.” What makes this even more convoluted, is that when that one defined identity that gives purpose to the mess is taken away, we lose a sense of purpose.

For example, for the professional athlete, when they stop playing their identity both for themselves and to those around them is lost. For the mom, when the kids leave home, she feels lost in how to understand and define herself. For the retired worker, there is no longer work to give purpose and validation of their identity and so people get lost in the search and may never get to the bucket list they have been waiting all life to complete. For those people whose identity is in God, when they begin to doubt and question, that identity along with God seems like only an illusion.  And in Los Angeles, when the dream of making it big doesn’t come through, then core identity is questioned again.

The search for identity is a courageous risk. We have to risk letting go of some of the roots that used to provide meaning. We have to be willing to look at ourselves honestly and not just they way we want to be.

If our search leads nowhere else, it must lead here: someone greater than ourselves. Someone who never changes must establish and clarify that identity. This is not to say that our identity must be in God, but rather our identity must be informed by God. And when our identity is informed by God, God must continue to form our identity. As much as we try to return to roots that used to give meaning, they no longer define us. By this, we are truly connected to the deepest most singular life giving root. The process is a risky venture. But we will continue to attempt to clarify our identity on our own unless we allow God to inform it.