So much in our culture right now begs us to fight. There are so many perceived battles that we begin fighting constructs and for constructs all the while losing sight of ourselves and those in front of us. Whether this is the racism in our country, the fear of wars, or gun control because of the latest horrific shooting our focus is drawn to fight for something or someone as a response. However noble these battles are, there is a bigger battle going on.
There is so much out there that questions both the truth of who we are and the truth of what we can become. Much of our walk with God becomes a battle of positioning ourself in the truth of God. What I have discovered is that instead of becoming easier, over time this battle becomes all that more difficult.
In Allender’s book, Bold Love, he says, “I am prepared for the battle when my desire to love is simply stronger than my desire to snuff out the flame of mercy that God has graciously intruded into my heart.”
Much of our battle is getting to a position to receive love and mercy from God. This is incredibly difficult. The more life experiences we have, the more challenges there are to see this as a reality. We can embrace our identity as the beloved in God, but this reality becomes more solidified in our lives when it is questioned.
There are so many times in life that I don’t experience as being the beloved. If I were to recount them, it would seem that I was the one God did not love. It is only in returning to God that we can experience love in the deep places of despair and ugly parts of ourselves. This kind of love in our lives frees us. But the battle comes in returning and believing that this indescribable love of God is real.
This battle can seem artificial. The battle in our mind can seem like something we are making up in order to get us by in life. But the battle is real.
The battle in our minds is a battle for our hearts. It is in our hearts that the truth of His love dwells. God’s love for us is more than a thought or a construct. We can experience being radically loved and we can know it for sure. But just as the thought of God’s love is challenged in our life, it becomes that more complicated when we don’t feel it.
I am becoming acutely aware of the trite answers to this problem. Both church and society is full of positive thinking. However, the battle is not thinking better thoughts about myself (although this is definitely a result). The battle is holding onto truth.
As we stand in such a profound truth, we declare for such a profound truth. It is in the place of this identity that we can fight battles that are worth fighting. It is from such a stance that we can fight other battles in love and in strength.
For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who get drunk, get drunk at night. But since we belong to the day, let us be self-controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet. For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. He died for us that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with Him. Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up. – I Thess 5:7-11
Honestly, it is so easy to fight all the other skirmishes that come our way. I have been fighting so many thoughts and feelings as I have been fighting to discover what God is doing in this season. But the battle that gets so easily lost is the battle to be connected to God.
In Hebrews 4:11, it urges us to strive to enter the rest of God. It seems so paradoxical that we would strive in order to rest. It would be much easier to strive to fight the good fight.
But it makes perfect sense if we understand “doing out of being.” Recently I came across the parable of the talents in Matthew 25. This passage can seem incredibly unfair given the circumstances. We could easily respond, “but God, it seems like he is doing the best he can. Why would you take it away?” However, we must understand that the last servant reveals his understanding of the master. His picture is of one who is unfair and mean. The servant was afraid and so responded from fear and did nothing. The master responds to him that even if this was true, the servant should have responded differently. However, the reality is that it isn’t true. Often our view of God will lead us to respond out of self-preservation. Our actions reveal our beliefs.
If our starting point is anything but truth, we will respond by fighting the wrong battle. To quote the famous missionary Heidi Baker, “More happens in 5 minutes in the anointing of God than years of doing it ourselves.”
The real battle is to strive to enter the rest of God. It is truly a battle of identity. There are so many other battles to fight. And in really difficult seasons, the battle to position ourselves in the truth of God doesn’t seem as urgent. However, this is the real battle. And from a position of being the redeemed, we can fight the battle of love.